I know what all you men are thinking: “Where are ways #1-#138?”
Let’s just say this is a family friendly blog, not a “family making” blog.
Today we’ll cover Way #139: iPhone 4 Wonderment
Step One: Secretly plot to buy your wife a new iPhone 4 (or whatever generation is currently “in” at time of reading this article). Please note this may involve months of saving, and in the event that your wife keeps the books, accruing a stash of cash that she won’t notice*.
[*Refer to Anarchists Guide to Money Laundering for Dummies when necessary.]
Step Two: Make a stop to your fast food joint of choice to acquire a brown paper bag. Please note that you may wish to purchase food substances to ensure realistic grease spots and true-to-life fast food smell. For best results: Choose a night which your wife previously mentions** she wants to cook a “big dinner.” The adjectives “large,” “fancy,” or “special,” may also be used; when “special” is used, it is suggested that all offspring are “conveniently” removed from the home as this particular surprise may merit merriment not suitable for anyone else but you and your wife.
[**Listening skills required.]
Step Three: Insert activated iPhone 4 into brown paper bag. For best results: Have AT&T activate phone as close to intended delivery as possible so iPhone is “user ready” when she removes it from the bag. This ensures maximum wonderment effect.
Step Four: OPTIONAL – Assume patent-pending “Fast Food Drink Cam Grip” (or simply FFDCG for short) to accurately record the surprise, and yet hide that fact that you’re doing so. Please note that perspiration on cup’s exterior may inhibit recording device’s functionality; it’s best to drain cup of liquid prior to recording.
Step Five: Walk into house casually, faux-surprised at the “big dinner” she’s making and offer her a burger and fries. (Utilizing the FFDCG here only adds to the illusion that you’ve “forgotten” about dinner).
Step Six: Enjoy whatever happens next. Watch my experience below.
PS :: I love you, Jenny Lee. ch:
aww that was awesome!!
I like the way you nonchalantly mentioned you were recording her when she started w/ the mushy stuff! haha “*cough* watch what you are saying I am recording you and i’m planning on placing this video on the internet for the world to hear!” hahaha
You guys are great!
…because you know exactly where this is going! lol “Camera Off!” Thanks, Beth. We think you guys are pretty amazing, too!
To cute Christopher!
What a good example.
I try!
This is a great post!You are so sweet to me
I love you endlessly.
Jennylee
One simple iPhone doesn’t do justice to what you do everyday for us, but it’s at least an attempt to say, “Thank you,” to the greatest women I’ve ever known.
Wow… this is awesome!!!
Now I feel really bad taking my wife to football practice on our anniversary. I should get her some french fries… or something.
French fries would have been perfect. There’s always next year…
The pair of you are so awesome !…what i love is that jen didnt freak out over burger and fries as dinner was cooking she just was gonna go with the flow …Great Example for sure !
She makes married life a dream. One of the easiest people to get along with in the whole world. That’s how she is every day.
Sweet Jenny. If I’d been surprised with an iPhone 4, I would’ve shrieked. Loudly. VERY loudly.
Tell Jenny that we have to try out FaceTime, I haven’t used it on my phone yet and I want to see how it works!
Mandee
I’m sure she’d love to test it out!
I have to make sure Joel watches this! *grin* So sweet!
You’re welcome.
You are Awesome my friend!!! I learn alot from the Blog of Hopper!!
Hopefully you’re learning good things! (Thanks!)
Way to go Christopher!!! That was soo great!!! Jenny’s very lucky. I would’ve never thought of that for sure!! I probably would’ve actually came home with the burger and fries instead!! Just kidding. I’m not that clueless!!! LOL! Much love you guys!
It’s good you’re taking notes now, bro! Study well.
So sweet…what a typical response from Jenny! “No, you should have it…” I love and miss you guys much!
God gave me the sweetest girl on the planet; not sure how that worked out. Just grateful. I’ve been praying for you guys every day this week! Miss you like, “Woah!”
This is the kind of wife I want to be someday! So kind and sweet and appreciates her husband, even when his plans don’t line up with hers (well considering as if it was actually food in the bag
I’m sure you will be, Sam: even the fact that you desire such a thing pleases the Lord greatly. Blessings! ch:
heh how sweet you guys are.i like jennifers reaction to you supposidly forgetting dinner. i must remember that for the future.God bless you both.
Thanks Lany. She is pretty amazing!
This is the sweetest thing ever! The best line “You’d touch it more” ahahaha. <3 Bubba you are a great husband!