“I Don’t Know of Any Good Churches”

It’s an old line. And you’ve heard it, too. Maybe you’re even guilty of saying it. But it comes in many styles.

“The Church is a mess.”

“Pastors are all two-faced.”

“No one preaches the Gospel anymore.”

And the best one: “I’ve looked for a good church in my area, but there just isn’t one.”

So I wanted to take a poll, open to those who were willing to respond, and find out how their church experience was on Sunday:

How would you describe your church service yesterday in 3 words or less? Ready…go!

I got lots of responses on FaceBook. Some were cute:

Bernard Rochat The big Apple

Jena D Sandquist Quesada Loved Sleeping In!!!! (Sorry, couldn’t stop myself)

Jon Allen ya… slept in!

Some where candid:

Millardthemk Jones Ok but powerless.

Joni Merg A Wilderness Journal

And the rest were–strangely–very contradictory of the statements I listed at the top:

Stephanie Lyon Reminder of Redemption!

Elizabeth Eiowing Dresdow AWESOME!!! :D

Tammy Alberry Desormo Anointed, Rockin’, Encouraging =D

Tim Desormo Uplifting, Encouraging, Awesome

Samantha Vence Changing, Active, Spiritual :)

Sharon Whitlock Gold Uplifting

Theresa Woodkirk The naked truth!

Elyssa Krivicich convicting, many babies…. (There were 5 babies getting dedicated yesterday).

Marti Eggleston people get ready!

Reenie Bovier real love

Donna Stanley alive, powerful, inspirational

Jamie Jo Rutigliano Alive ! Anointed ! Awesome !

Jonathan Cowan spirit, truth, love

Kathleen Seery Anointed !Restoring ! Hope !

Amy MacDougall It hit home!

Joseph Anthony Cook Intensely Spirit Filled!!

Sandi Kirkwood Bethel was beautiful

Beth Walrath Awakening, powerful, encouraging.

Courtney Kleefeld hyper, redeeming, inspiring.

Wayne Thomas Batson Forgiveness is expensive.

Julie A. Mason Shelmidine ?”Open the BLINDS!”

Thomas Brennan Encountered by Christ.

And then the best one, that pretty much sums up how I feel about the Body of Christ:

Millardthemk Jones Wow ma, I just read all the comments, people must have had great sundays!

Yes! They did! Despite what the critics claim, the Church is a glorious, wonderful thing, full of life, change, adventure, and growth, hit by pain, defeats, and hardship, and driven by flawed, passionate people who are ever attempting to merge heaven and earth.

I learned from my senior pastor that whenever someone makes a sweeping generalization condemning some aspect of the church, we should always reply with a question: “Who?”

Most people, I’ve found, can actually name one person that embodies their accusation. Maybe even two. Because it’s their experience. And at least in identifying those particulars we can have a legitimate discussion.

But when the entire Body of Christ takes the blame for one or two poor experiences–whether a moment or a season–we do God a terrible injustice. The Bride, you see, is His invention, not ours. (And He likes her enough to come back for Her).

My friend Chris Mooney summarized this best when–without knowing the details of this post–replied to a my status update that I was writing something about the Bride of Christ:

Chris Mooney careful writing about someone’s bride, tends to be taken personal by the hubby. :)

So how was your church experience this past Sunday? Please add to the conversation.

ch:

PHOTO CREDIT: @JENNIFERLHOPPER

…And I’ll Raise You an Elbow Cop!

In case you hadn’t read, Sir Wayne Thomas Batson slapped me with a gauntlet tonight, then threw it at my feet.

A challenge.

To see which of us will finish our current book project first.

His, The Errant King, book 2 of the Dark Sea Annals.

Mine, book 1 of what is currently code-named “TSR.

The stakes are high. Belligerent blog comments.

The reward sweet. Social media bragging rights.

And I heartily accept with a back-handed thwack of an elbow cop to the cheek! That, and I need your help, lords and ladies all. (Even your lapdogs are welcome).

Sir Wayne and I would like to invite you into the carnage. First, you’ll need to choose a side. Who do you say will win? Post here and on Sir Wayne’s site (or on FB or Twitter). Then tell us approximately how many thousand words the winning book will be.

Everyone who picks the correct winner and gets the wordcount within +/- 5,000 words wins a prize!*

Whoever picks the correct winner and is closest to the actual wordcount, wins a bigger prize!**

Hint: the final word count of the winning book will definitely be OVER 50,000 words. If you’re looking for a ballpark figure, you might consider investigating our other books.

What are you waiting for? Choose your side now: The Noble Tribe of the Clean Shaven, or the Razorless Knotted Hair Mass Clan. Who will finish his novel first and how long will it be? ch:

*Note: the prize will definitely be better than a rusted paper clip, but somewhat inferior to hot air balloon ride with Buzz Aldrin.

**Note: the bigger prize will definitely be better than piece of lint, but somewhat inferior to a live sea turtle.

Live @ Five

This week has been full of media advertising for Music for the Mission happening tomorrow night. I love seeing my city get behind such a wonderful cause. And I really enjoy getting to talk about the crazy love of Jesus on radio and television.

My favorite interview of the week was last night on AM 1240′s Live at Five show with Glenn Curry. Listen and pass on, especially to those living in Northern NY. God is opening some awesome doors to reach people with His extravagant grace in Jefferson County. ch:

LISTEN HERE

Nedrick the Briefcase Pedalboard

I got tired of trying to justify a $300 purchase for a road-worthy pedalboard. Yeah, I’ll probably go that way eventually. But not now. That, and I finally retired my Boss BCB60 pedalboard. It was a great compact concept, but eventually broke and simply didn’t have enough real-estate for my pedals.

I’d long had a vision of filling a briefcase with my pedals, and put it on my to-do list in 2009. Yeah, I know. It’s 2011.

So while I was helping my parents move (ie, picking through some of my old junk), I found a briefcase from the late seventies. And decided it was time.

Here’s the process:

1.) The briefcase. Nedrick, I’ve named him. A late 70′s model that’s seen better days, but that’s really in top condition.

2.) The latch prongs on the lid were very lose (and will eventually be replaced; read on). And the folio trays (on lid) were ripping away. All in all a real find. As the bottom is actually too deep for the pedals (without making the handled-face section a fold-down…far too much work), I opted to use the lip as the pedal tray.

3.) I tore the folio trays out completely, unscrewed the latch prongs, and started scrapping away at the paperboard and glue that missed out on the rapture. Poor dears. I also cut off the two button straps (pictured).

4.) I could see myself staring at the tacky wood finish of my pedal board and getting distracted during a worship set, thinking, “Why in the world didn’t I take a few minutes to at least spray paint a neutral color over that thing? Gosh.” So I prepped it for painting using some electrical tape, plastic bags, and leftover construction paper.

5.) Two light coats of Valspar white later, it’s time for three strips of industrial strength 2″ Velcro. I prefer the bristly “hooked” side on the floor as it gathers less fuzzies, leaving the “furry” side for the bottoms of the pedals.

6.) My initial lay-down doesn’t look too shabby. The plugs on the top of my Boss AD-5 (a unit I will eventually replace) forced my to turn it on it’s side in order to make enough room for my tremolo (Boss TR-2; not pictured). The top row of pedals is for my acoustic, while the bottom is dedicated to my electric.

7.) Future mods will include: removing the latch prongs (disregarding the stock locking system altogether), and outfitting the briefcase with 4 snap-on latches from Home Depot ($10); cutting off the bottom entirely (and removing the hinged arms) to make the “top” completely removable (latched on when finished by the 4 new latches); permanently screwing the AC/DC power-supply converter to the tray (pictured lower left); and adding a 1/2″ wooden square dowel (stored inside) to place under the far side of the tray to give the board a slight angle when in use. I may also get super fancy and give Nedrick some exterior branding; any ideas?

If you have a project of your own, please feel free to link it below. And any ideas for mine are welcome, too! ch:


THK Episode 3

In Episode 3, the audience gets a look at The Hopper Kids at the kitchen table. From Judah’s priceless cereal destruction and hilarious “foo-foo,” to Eva and Luik leading the Dutch Blitz charge, only a trip outside into the snow gives daddy enough time to keep up with their messes. ch: